Last time you read a list of things that don’t (really) exist, why they don’t exist, and what exists in their place.
Today, I have more: Thirteen additional items that don’t (really) exist.
Read them at your own peril…
1. “Must see” doesn’t exist. That’s just fancy, coma-inducing marketing language for, “Please addict yourself to our crappy programming so our advertisers don’t come to their senses and stop wasting their money on a dead medium like television.”
Here’s the naked truth: You’re not their little target anymore. You are in charge of how much attention you choose to give. How much money did you make last month by watching television?
2. “Off the record” doesn’t exist. Everything matters, everybody’s watching and everything’s a performance. You’re on the record, all the time, whether you like or not. I sure hope your integrity is tact.
Or else you’ll end up like one of those moronic athletes who chooses to throw away his entire reputation and legacy on one night’s stupidity. Or, in Tiger Woods’ case, thirteen nights. But who’s counting? Would you want to become known for what you’re about to do?
3. Overnight successes don’t exist. Instead, you work your ass off for about twenty years when nobody notices, nobody cares and nobody remembers. And then one day you take a deep breath, look in the mirror and say, “It’s about time.” How patient are you willing to be?
4. Quick fixes don’t exist. I guarantee: When you get your fix, you will not be fixed. You will want more very soon. That’s the nature of addiction.
That’s why the quick fix industry makes so much money: Never-ending repeat business is guaranteed because of infinitely unsatisfied customers. I wonder what would happen if you made the decision to be satisfied right now. What are you currently addicted to?
5. Recession-Proof doesn’t exist. Everyone is affected by a recession. Everyone. Maybe not financially. But we all feel it. Physically, emotionally and spiritually. Don’t be so arrogant as to assume the recession wants nothing to do with you.
I got news for you: The recession doesn’t care if you sell an inelastic, “recession-proof” product. It’s still coming after you. And if you leave your guard down, it’s going to deliver the death stroke when you least expect. How are you preparing for the devastation?
6. Shortcuts don’t exist. Shortcuts cause stress, rarely succeed and often backfire. They never go unpunished. They are a refuge for slackers and a lazy man’s panacea. Ultimately, shortcuts don’t lead anywhere but the Exit Door. Longcuts, on the other hand, lead to the finish line.
So, here’s my suggestion: Learn the chords. Take the long cut. Work your face off. Develop bottomless patience. You will win, win BIG, and win alone. How much money is impatience costing you?
7. Stupid questions don’t exist. As the great philosopher Homer Simpson once said, “There are no stupid questions – only stupid people.” In this case, the stupid people who don’t ask questions.
“That the problem with our educational system,” complained George Carlin, “kids shouldn’t be taught to read, they should be taught to question what they read.” What questions are you afraid to ask?
8. The Real World doesn’t exist. As John Mayer sang in the song No Such Thing, “I wanna run through the halls of my high school and scream at the top of my lungs, ‘There’s no such thing as The Real World – it’s just a lie you’ve got to rise above.’” What lies are you afraid to call people out on?
9. Time doesn’t exist. If you don’t compartmentalize your life, you, become the SOURCE of time. And that’s when you realize that you always have heaps of time to do anything and everything you’ve ever wanted. Also, it depends on how you define your activities.
For example, people complain they don’t have time to meditate. But if you learn to approach every experience as a meditation, you’re never (not) meditating. I think if people sat down and actually mapped out their energy investments, they’d be astonished at how out of whack their priorities were. How would your daily life be different if you accepted yourself as the source of time?
10. Warm calls don’t exist. Stop kidding yourself. If the prospect doesn’t know you and isn’t expecting you, it’s cold. Even if she DOES know you and IS expecting you, if she’s not your friend, it’s cold.
People buy people first. Grasp this distinction and you will make more sales. When was the last time you were excited to answer a phone call from a caller ID you didn’t recognize?
11. Waste doesn’t exist. Everything is valuable. Everything is a contribution. Everything is productive to something. Everyone you encounter is your mentor. Think this way and you’ll never feel wasteful again. What’s your recycling plan?
12. Work/Life Balance doesn’t exist. Balance is for ballerinas. You need to focus on alignment. That means gathering all the components of your life and asking them to join hands in a circle around your cherished values, singing and dancing and rejoicing for eternity.
Once that’s accomplished, an occasional break in the balance isn’t won’t be able to hurt you. As long as you maintain a well-diversified portfolio of happiness, you’ll be fine. What is out of alignment?
13. Writer’s Block doesn’t exist. Writing is an extension of thinking. You don’t have Writer’s Block; you have Thinker’s Block. Stop blaming your lack of creativity and productivity on some evil, external force of resistance over which you have zero control.
It’s you. It’s always you. When was the last time you took time to just think?
REMEMBER: No matter how many lies you’ve been conditioned to believe, certain things don’t (really) exist.
Perhaps you should make a list of your own.
LET ME ASK YA THIS…
What’s on your list of things that don’t exist?
LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
Leave a comment on this blog with your list of things that don’t exist, why they don’t exist, and what exists in their place.
That Guy with the Nametag
Author, Speaker, Coach, Entrepreneur
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